Do & Do Not. There is always Try.
Yoda got shit wrong.
The Jedi-curious among you might storm my death star for this one. But using that Force, Luke, sure seems like a lesson in strict dualistic antagonism. Dark or Light? Do or Do Not? Where's the party without the chaos and possibility of non-binary reality?
The curious Try. The explorers of the universe Try. Freethinkers Try. Overcoming the fear of Trying might be THE human building block, that essential Lego piece that connects the current Us to the groovy future Us.
It's OK that Trying might not equate to Doing. Not only OK, but crucial. To Try and Not Do can have more bang-for-the-buck outcome than Trying and Doing. In fact Trying and Not Doing is still very much Doing.
Yup, all Trying is Doing, with a spectrum of failure. And failure, as I say often, is not a lack of success.
There's a silly sport I participate in called Mas Wrestling. Silly, but brutal. Like many physical pursuits, mas has its legitimate dangers. It's a sport that will smack you down if you're not prepared. When the intensity is cranked up, mas will find your weakness and pounce on it, making sure you're aware of your limitations, using injury as an I-told-you-so.
So it's a little frightening to the uninitiated. Whenever I teach workshops in mas, many adults either approach the board with extreme hesitation, or they linger on the sidelines as observers, since adults are often convinced there is no Try, only Do. And Doing, in this case, could break them.
Any other practitioner of almost any other martial, contact, or strength sport is recognizing a similar safari. It’s the art of being a student or a teacher.
Teaching illuminating a journey of Trying, and keeping the lessons progressive. Which means inducing temptation in safety, and the bounty of being a perpetual beginner. In this very specific case of an obscure sport that looks like a cross between frolic and torture, that means letting people Try mas wrestling, but not necessarily Do mas wrestling.
This was first apparent to me when I taught cross-country skiing a lifetime ago. Beginners spend their first day cross-country plodding, with actual skiing still being a bit of fantasy. And that’s awesome. They've officially Tried it, but have yet to really Do it. But the door is open, and many will walk through.
You're probably already applying this lens to movement journeys you've been on. Even when we eventually do Do it, we still are constantly trying. (Yeah, I said do do).
Back to Mas for a moment. Here's a scenario that has played out almost every time I've taught a workshop. Lots of hesitant adults, not a single hesitant child. Every kid that was dragged along by their parents to this weird sport thing ends up pushing mom or dad aside to get to the board as quick as they can. They crave Trying.
(This, by the way, is consistent for a most of the styles of play I teach adults. Kids often have to blaze that trail for their parents.)
At each mas workshop, there's a list of intimidating factors right out of the gate. I begin by highlighting the potential dangers. My credentials of being an international competitor are often repeated by the hosts of the workshops, so my pedigree is established. Since the sport itself just looks weird and uncomfortable, it helps to hear the truth from an expert.
Most adults who brave sitting at the board for their virgin battle with me ask that I go gentle. OF COURSE I'm gonna be gentle. Teaching and learning is not Doing. I want every person there to succeed at Trying, and THEN make decisions about what steps they feel like taking next. Imagine my instructor cred if I popped people's hamstrings with glee and abandon.
Plus, I simply don't have the energy to Do mas with everyone there. Let's save that for after you've Tried mas. I'm sort of flattered that y'all think I'm going to destroy you once you sit down at the mas board, but how about we work on letting you thrive?
I don't recall a single kid every asking me to go easy on them, though. Their undiluted ability to Try is a raw immersion in equal parts of trust and simply showing up. Sure, they're more malleable than their adult counterparts, but that says more about the life choices of the adult than anything else.
Try or Don't Try. Them's your choices.
Consider not being out-Tried by your kids, though. Ya don't have to Try mas wrestling, but I'd like to hear about what you do Try.
Trying as an art form and lifestyle is embracing your Authentic Self as an Expert. Beginner. I ramble on about that here. Meanwhile, go ahead and TRY to explore an interesting movement groove today as a celebration of Yourself. Have a curiosity kink. How will your strength manifest today?
BodyTribe is now represented here on Substack. Time for me to think out loud while working on my next book about authentic authentic strength. Want more? The BodyTribe website is the depository for the thinks & feels of the What and Why of strength, movement, and Becoming. Meanwhile this little corner of expression will expand as well. Stay tuned!
Thank you so much for sharing this point of view. I think I have been trying this without putting words to it as eloquent as you have. Since developing a chronic illness sometimes I get sad that I can no longer “do” some of the movement exercises I used to. I miss running so sometimes I just “do not” and end up doing nothing. But this is a good reminder that doing something is still doing. Trying but not quite getting there is still doing. Maybe someday I’ll “do” running again, but for now there are still many movements I can enjoy and explore while trying rather than being sad I’m not “doing.” Thank you. Keep sharing!